Maybe you love me or maybe you don't

While I was in Montreal, I questioned whether I actually liked music. To be more specific, it has more to do with my ability to distinguish between good music and bad music. Can I categorize music without input from outside sources? That is probably a better phrasing of the question. I have read and talked about music so much that I cannot easily differentiate my opinions from those of others. On several occasions, I have picked up albums solely on the recommendations of other people. I make a point of buying those records that make the “best of” lists (usually with Christmas money). I became very worried about this fact because it bugged me that I could not separate my thoughts from those around me. This may seem like a silly question, it is very important to me because I have built quite a bit of my persona around my love of music. Several relationships in my life hang delicately on this axis.

I know I’m a little bit of a snob when it comes to music. I realize that there are certain pieces that I like more because of their cultural import than my personal tastes. Those don't give me any headaches. I accept that I need to know and appreciate certain bands, songs, and albums simply to belong to the music hipster subculture. It’s the ones I have an emotional investment in that cause me the heartache; the ones that ask something of me.

I also wonder about songs that share a history with me. Are these things aesthetically good or am I associate my enjoyment with the memory of a personal moment (the opposite can also be said about dislike)? I am not talking about an objective, passionless perspective here. What I am wondering is if my love of the Weakerthans’ Left and Leaving has more to the timing of its release with my first of university than the music itself.

I realize that this question has few repercussions in the real world but it still makes me wonder. I think that by asking these questions I keep my mind alert and my conversation interesting. At least it hasn’t kept me up at night.